Shi no Yume v.4.0 the demon

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Thursday, June 26, 2003
Playlist: Kagayaki - Candidate for Goddess

Ngrrghhhh...

Just finished reading HP5. *rubs eyes* I'm so fricking tired... Anyway, so, I hadn't expected to get my hands on the book so soon, but yesterday was a strange day and... I'll talk about yesterday first. (btw, I'm not about to spoil HP here, so if you're looking for spoilers, don't bother looking further for them; this is my blog, is what I write is mostly about ME)

So, Mom wakes up at around 10:45 in the morning yesterday because the printer wasn't working, and I get up, realize we have a guest in our house, and decides that I didn't want to stay around. Since I was supposed to drop Maryam's yearbook off at her house, I decided to just leave the house and walk there. In my PJs. Well, it was really a t-shirt and a pair of cotton pants I was sleeping in. I was tired, I didn't feel like grooming and changing into day-clothes, and I didn't really give myself any time to think about what I was doing, so I brushed my teeth, splashed some cold water onto my face (it was a already a hot morning), and set off for Maryam's house, which was only 1.5 blocks away. I wasn't exactly awake the entire time... >___> but that was ok, cos when I arrived at Maryam's house, her door was open and both she and her mom were in their sleepwear too, watching tv, and having brunch. ^^; Well, I joined them for brunch, woke up a bit (though not enough to feel particularly stupid about having left the house and crossed a traffic-busy street in my PJs), and they asked if I wanted to go to the bookstore with them. I did, and went home to change first (now, I was awake enough to realize that going to the bookstore in my PJs was't too bright an idea). So, we went, and I had a terrible urge to buy something, seeing as I haven't bought (or read) any particuarly good books recently. I decided to get the 3rd book in the Kushiel series, since B&N had the autographed version (*cheers*). Then, as I was leaving the counter, I saw a boy (from high school, actually) ask about the number of HP books the store had in stock. So, I went back and asked how much the books were, seeing as I didn't exactly know, and they asked me if I wanted to get the book. They told me they only had a couple of copies left, and since it was the same cashier who rang me up early and knew that I had a membership discount, he told me that it'd be around 17 dollars for me, which is a lot lower than I'd expected. So, of course, I got it... *cackles a bit* Well, I was pretty delighted the rest of the day. At one point, I couldn't control my glee, and started bouncing up and down in my living room screaming, "I've got Harry Potter number five! I've got Harry Potter number 5!", after which Maryam wrote 'Angela is insane' on a piece of paper on my desk. My self-control is amazing; I managed to put the book aside and go hang out with Maryam for the whole rest of the day and didn't start the book until around 6 or 7 in the evening. Anyway, I covered more than 500 pages before a migraine that'd been plagueing me for two hours got the best of me and forced me to bed, though, if I'd had my way and Madam Pomfrey's healing skills, I woulda gotten rid of the headache and kept reading until I finished the book. So, I finished the book just now, which I didn't really start until around 6 or 7 today as well, since I spent most of the day with Eugene and Jennifer. My migraine made a brief appearance around early afternoon, made me sick, and returned just an hour ago. I'm hurting quite badly right now, and my eyes are straining... =_____=;; But anyway, the book...

I think I was pretty pissed off the entire time, what with something bad happening every few pages. There were some good parts (mostly dialogue from the Wealseys that had me laughing my face red), but... argh, the general stupidity of the characters. Those utter gits! There's not a shred of common sense among them, except maybe for Hermione, but Harry doesn't bother to listen to her much. God, I don't even want to talk about the so-called main character, because if I do, I'm not going to stop talking about how STUPID he is, how completely IDIOTIC his actions are, how much he needs a whack upside the head. Maybe if someone did slap him in the head it'll knock some sense into him; no wait, he got hit in the head quite a few times through the course of the book, and it didn't work. The fact that it's supposed to be a book for children rather limits the way the story could have gone, and FUCK IT THERE IS NO CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!!! I HATE IT WHEN THERE'S NO CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!! THEY'RE JUST GOING TO STAY STUPID AND HAVE SHIT FOR COMMON SENSE FOREVER!!! *resists urge to tear book from cover to cover* Ok, ok, I'm calm, I really don't need my migraine to get worse, right? Anyway, I've seen some fans talk about J.K. Rowling like she's a goddess, but she's really NOT. I mean, her writing is mediocre, her story-telling skills are rather fabulous (how else do you explain the fact that I didn't put the book down for 7 hours...), but the way she develops her plot... ugh, absolutely abysmal, although I do have to say that she ties up loose ends very neatly. Ngghh, I said I wouldn't post spoilers, so I won't. I'm not sure I've sorted out how I feel about this book yet anyway. I AM sure, however, that I'm going to enjoy fanfics a lot more, and I'm ABSOLUTELY sure that there will be a flood of new fanfics by fans who simply adore Rowling (although I can't see why, after what she made happen in that battle in the room with the veil), as well as the disappearance of some good fics whose authors are too canon-conscious to let their fics contradict the events of the HP books. *snarls* Well, after the 5th book, I'm certain that I'm going to enjoy fanfics a lot more now (not that I haven't before)

Another thing about reading the 5th book... the entire time, I felt like I was reading some published fanfic, except that the important events were a bit nightmarish and horrible. I kept on coming across stuff that I was sure I'd seen online before in various HP fics... Yuh, HP5 definitely felt like one long, nightmarish fanfic-type story. I really couldn't shake off the feeling that I was reading a fanfic... *groans in confusion*

12:21 a.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Monday, June 23, 2003
Playlist: Kopperia no Hitsugi - Ali Project, Noir op

I called a number today regarding the Job Opportunity part of my financial aid letter, and the guy asks for my email so he can sent me stuff about the program, and we run into some problems while I'm spelling out my email address for him:

me: ...-l-v-...
guy: 'z'?
me: no, 'v'
guy: 'z' as in zebra?
me: 'v'!
guy: ...'Z'?
me: no. Veeeee!
guy: Oh! 'V'! As in "Victor"!

aha, that was amusing. I hung up the phone afterwards, and my mom, who apparently was listening, says, "you should have just said 'V' as in 'Victor'." I did a doubletake; apparently, "Victor" is what they use as an example, like when people say, "B as in Boy", or "Z as in Zebra".

And then, as if that wasn't enough funnies, I check my email 10 minutes later, and there's two emails from the guy, and it starts off with, "Hello...Hmm...I Forgot to Ask You Your Name", plus a short-long info on Job Op. Hahaha.

01:24 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Sunday, June 22, 2003
Playlist: Byakuya~True Light - DNAngel op

Oh. My. God. It's out. I can't believe I passed THE day without realizing it. I went through the entire day yesterday without realizing that all over the U.S., people are getting their paws on the fifth Harry Potter book and eagerly flipping through the much awaited book. I was at the library yesterday to check on the holds I have, and my wait on HP#5 dropped from 44 to 25 of 99. Hopefully, I shall have the book in my hands in 2 weeks, since the library ordered 20+ copies. >____< I can't wait...

09:33 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Saturday, June 21, 2003
Playlist: Spiral-Suiri no Kizuna - (Strawberry JAM) Kibouhou

Watched 9 episodes of "Spiral - Suiri no Kizuna" all at once today. Ngghh, I want more. Ka-chan, when will you have more? ^____^ and why have I never heard of Spiral before? It's very good~~ Waaaiii~ Narumi Ayumu-kun~~ you rock so much with your wonderful logic and reasoning and self-hatred and always staying one step ahead of that scary little girl who likes bombs too much~ *_____* And even Hiyono-chan with her uber-bright optimism and weird song and Hiyono-Punch (Double! Teddy! Bunny!) is cute and non-annoying. And Eyes-kun is gay. I'm sure of it. XD XD XD;; I want the opening song. *goes to find OP theme* I also watched Ep. 1-3 of Dragon Drive, which isn't as good as Spiral, but is more light-hearted and has a better OP theme, imo. It's called "True", sung by Shimokawa Mikuni, who sang a song for Saiyuki. She has a nice voice.

01:07 a.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Thursday, June 19, 2003
Playlist:

I read a bit of Paradise Kiss at B&N today while waiting to see The Italian Job at AMC... *twitches* I want more Paradise Kiss...

07:53 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Thursday, June 19, 2003
Playlist: Angel - Core of Soul

This story scares the FUCK out of me. Scheisse!! *shudders* It scares the fuck out of me and takes my breath away and makes me heartsick and I want to sob until I am empty and shriek for help at the top of my lungs. Forget breathing. This story is making me suffocate with merely its absolutely mind-numbing, languishing... and shit, if it wasn't possible to go blind from reading a story, then I'm willing to claw my eyes out just so I can prove how fricking powerful that story was. That story makes me FORGET to breathe (and goddammit I’m getting a headache from lack of oxygen) and it’s slowly killing me by going from something normal to something just too awful/beautiful/maddeningly-despairing to describe properly with words. Though god knows I’m trying to. If there are such things as multiple universes, then I fervently hope nothing like what this story has detailed will ever EVER happen. It is too poignant, too beautiful, too sweetbitter and rolls around on your tongue like addictive poetry drowned in poison. I can’t breathe... can’t stop shivering... where's Hiroshi...

tired...
01:06 a.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Tuesday, June 17, 2003
Playlist: Any - Mr. Children

Summer. Eh. You really don't feel such a thing as summer when you're stuck indoors in SF, where it's windy as fuck and every afternoon, like clockwork, the wind picks up speed and whoooshs around the neighborhood like some grief-stricken goddess in mourning. Whooooooooooooo~~!! It goes, and is disconcerting as hell. And, also like clockwork, it stops completely before night falls. Weird. Anyway, I won't really get to experience summer until I'm back in Berkeley (tomorrow) and going to see movies. And poor Jean is so numbed by pain (and painkillers) that she really can't do anything. I think I picked a bad time to visit, although it really is quite relaxing here. Once I go back, I shall have to face the task of finding a job. Bah.

bored
12:36 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Monday, June 16, 2003
Playlist: random piano playing (Jean's practicing, I think) *listens further* (no, wait, it's Daniel...you can tell from the random banging)

Reading Jean's blog made me remember what happened when she slept over at my house. As per usual when she visits my house, we shared my bed, but she kept rolling into the dent in the middle of the futon, so I really only ended up with 1/3 of the bed. I couldn't breathe very well because we had a really big dinner after graduation, so I had to retrieve Hiroshi from where I tossed him on the floor and sleep with him/it between me and Jean. That helped me breathe, for some reason. -__-;; (god, if I've developed a weakness, why did it have to be a teddy bear...?). Anyway, I woke up once or twice during the night, but overall I slept pretty well. In the morning, when I was half dozing, I opened my eyes slightly due to Jean's constant squriming and flopping, just in time to see her seize Hiroshi by the foot and throw him over my face and off the bed! O__o <-- was my expression, and I thought to myself, "How dare she!" before I fell asleep again. Hah, and she thought I didn't notice. I have taken revenge by taking her stuffed animal raccoon (Keita-chan) by the tail and punching it lightly in the face, as well as poking my finger into the hole Jean made in its armpit. Then I tossed it up and down and almost didn't catch it. Jean was on the phone at the time, and couldn't stop me. Hah! =P

*realizes that the above was completely childish* Ugh. Jean says that Hiroshi's hindpaw was in her mouth all night. Eww. I'm going to have to go home and wash him now...

thinking of further revenge on innocent stuffed animals
09:15 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Monday, June 16, 2003
Playlist: Drought - Vienna Teng

Oh, something that I found highly amusing over the weekend was this: while we were at old art teacher's house, I was showing Jean the picture of NickCarter!Draco that I'd squicked Vinita out with and I was telling her about the similarities, and Dannyo, Jean's little brother, comes up behind us. He took one long look at the picture (both Jean and I were watching him), and said, "Oh. Draco Malfoy."

......

XDXDXDXD;;; Oh god... it's priceless. *breaks into hysterical cackles* Ahh, you know, I don't know if he overheard our conversation or not, or if he really thought that picture looked like DM, but... *snickers*

Anyway, another note about the Harry Potter books. I'd been thinking about reading all of them over before the 5th book came out (you know, fresh memory about what's happened so far n everything), and feeling sick at the thought of having to read all four book over again. As wonderful as the fandom is (and it surely is a wonderful fandom *thinks of veela inc.*), the books aren't really all that fabulous, especially after reading some incredibly breathtaking fics on Snoogle. However, interestingly enough, once I forced myself to open the books, it was pathetically hard to tear myself away (especially the third book; I practically drooled over all the Lupin or Sirius sections of the book, which would have been bad if I'd actually allowed myself to do so, seeing as the books belong to Jean and I'm sure she wouldn't appreciate drool marks on her pages). When I read over the 3rd book, I, for the life of me, couldn't understand why people worship Snape at all. He was abysmally unfair and mean in ways I can't imagine people being. How in the world did people find him worthy of like? I mean, certainly, he redeemed himself in the fourth book, but that still doesn't explain the number of Snape fans that existed before the release of the fourth book.

08:30 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Monday, June 16, 2003
Playlist: The Tower - Vienna Teng

Well, what with the final math test, graduation, Jean's visit, and my visiting Jean in return, I've completely neglected blogging. I also didn't finish the countdown for graduation. So, here it is: Thursday, June 12th, 2003: 1 day till graduation. Friday, June 13th, 2003: 0 days till graduation. On Friday, after the morning rehearsal, Maryam and I went dress-shopping, since she wanted to buy a dress to wear underneath her graduation gown. I bought a dress too, and although I hadn't planned on wearing it to graduation, I did. Graduation was a mess. That is, we graduated successfully, but there were a lot of enthuisastic screaming and yelling from the audience, a lot of unwarranted dancing on stage as various overexcited graduates became overwhelmed by the realization that they were no longer seniors and therefore could not be seriously penalized for a bit of showing-off in front of an audience of more than 7000. There were supposed to have been no beach balls allowed, but people sneaked them in nevertheless. There were no less than 4 beachballs flying around the pit as exuberant graduates passed them from hand to hand and tried to keep them from being confiscated by the teachers and deans present. At one point, there was even an inflated shark being batted from section to section. It was bad enough that nobody paid any attention to the performers (although, seriously, who could expect them to?), but what really pissed me off was how they wouldn't even pay any attention to the graduating seniors who were giving speeches. Animals. Anyway, enough about graduation. I'm sure it was a spectacular event for the audience, but as one of the participants, I have yet to be hit with the realization that high school is really over, that I won't be seeing some of those people ever again. I mean, how do you expect me to take it seriously when I saw Marley the very next day on BART? Anyway, so, that was graduation. Dad sat in the audience with Jean, and Mom was in the disabled section with Helen to keep her company. I was surprised and pleased to receive flowers from Joan, Maryam's mom. I also finally got to meet Maryam's infamous relatives, although probably not the ones she keep telling me about. They seemed very earnest and nice. One of them helped me with my graduation cap when it fell off during picture-taking. Yeah, pictures. *unenthuisastically* There were a lot of them being taken, by various families who were particularly keen on getting pictures of their child and his/her friends together... lots of flashing camera lights and cheesy posing and constant smiling for the camera...

So, anyway, I went home with Jean on Saturday, after I got my hair cut (thinned, more like) at Imagine Beauty Salon (which cost me more money than I'd have cared to pay, but what can ya do?). I don't expect to go home until Wednesday. Sunday was church, accompanying Jean and Daniel on their piano lessons, then over to our old art teacher's house for dinner. (well, MY old art teacher, in any case. I don't know if Jean still studies with her) We were there till 9. Today, Jean had to go get her wisdom teeth pulled (ouch...) She didn't come back until almost 2 o'clock. Meanwhile, I read HP #3, and started HP #4, although I don't think I'll finish anytime soon. I'm almost at the first task section, though. In between all these, I've been playing ping pong with Danial, Jean's mom, and Jean's dad. I think I've gotten better, and I've almost gotten the hang of the game rules itself. I'm still a little slow, though, since I've only been playing against Jean's dad's left hand, and not his right hand (which freaks the hell out of me, the speed with which he slams the ping pong ball back... ^^;;) Ping pong is really really fun. It's about the only exercise I get around here, since I have no access to a SF gym, and it's too windy to go outside anyway. I should really call Cindy and arrange to play badminton at Laney with her. Otherwise I'll actually have to visit the YMCA...

Well, I think they're calling about dinner, so, I'll be getting off here.

07:14 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Wednesday, June 11, 2003
Playlist: Mass in B minor Aria Agnus Dei - Bach

... XDXDXD;;;!!!! ^________^;;; oohhh maaaannn... in the last half hour... I did something quite... nasty and needlessly cruel to Vinita... ^^;; I'm sorry, I really am, but I had to get the point across to you...

Conversation over AIM (condensed in parts to save space)
KuroiTsubasaKei: ooh, guess what
Chibi Miyu: hmm?
KuroiTsubasaKei: i think i found the perfect adult version of draco... and... it's... well, when i find the picture, i'll show you...
Chibi Miyu: ^^;;
[snips off tangent convo about Eli Marienthal]
KuroiTsubasaKei: the PICTURE! i have foundit!
Chibi Miyu: okay, okay, so lemme see it
KuroiTsubasaKei: now, before you get squicked by who it is... forget who he is and take a good look [the picture] *sigh* somehow, it just doesn't look as good as it was hanging up on my friend's bedroom wall... looking 3d... *sighs*
Chibi Miyu: ew! ew ew ew! bsb! *needs to cleanse self now*
KuroiTsubasaKei: LOL oh come on! give it a chance! i'm squicked too, but! you have to admit that's sort of what draco would look like...
Chibi Miyu: is it just me or do his eyes seem a bit far apart?
KuroiTsubasaKei: naw, just a big nose in the pic. my friend had it folded onthe wall in the corner, so that it looked 3d (and therefore the face didn't look so wide)
Chibi Miyu: your friend has no taste
KuroiTsubasaKei: (yeah, she doesn't) anyway, i walked into her room, and literally had to stop and take a breath. if his eyes were a little bigger, his face a little narrower, and his hair better done, there would some resemblance between what i think grown-up!draco would look like and ... nick carter. even the lips are the right shape...
Chibi Miyu: augh! don't say the name! must...wash...eyes
KuroiTsubasaKei: LOL i have to say, that's the best picture i've seen of him ever. i mean, i fairly had to gouge my eyes out looking for this picture online and having seen at least 3 dozen picture... i've developed some immunity. besides, i didn't know it was him when i first saw him and even after my friend told me, i still couldn't believe it was him. i mean, if you compare this picture to the other pics, it doesn't look much like him at all. the expression is unusual for him
Chibi Miyu: waitasec...nick carter...is he related to that aaron carter twerp i keep seeing calenders and cds of?
KuroiTsubasaKei: LOL older bro
Chibi Miyu: that would explain it...>_>
KuroiTsubasaKei: aaron carter is even worse
Chibi Miyu: like i said, twerp
KuroiTsubasaKei: lol of course
[snips some more]
Chibi Miyu: i do my best to ignore them all
KuroiTsubasaKei: yeah, me too, which is why i didn't recognize him at first... ^^;; heheh... have i killed you yet?
Chibi Miyu: *shudders*
KuroiTsubasaKei: ah, i guess not *gives a flick* i shan't bother you with more pictures, but, seriously, am i just raving mad for thinking there is a resemblance?
Chibi Miyu: *grudgingly* ....no...
KuroiTsubasaKei: *blinks innocently* no? I'm wrong? or no, I'm not mad??
Chibi Miyu: bitch -_____-
KuroiTsubasaKei: rofl *dances* mwahahahahahahahaha!!!! *thoroughly rubs it in*
Chibi Miyu: if only you were here, so i could smack you. repeatedly.
KuroiTsubasaKei: ^^;; oohh, i'm going to regret this later... but... ahahahaha!!! yes, and i shall let you, because what i did was cruel. ^^;; *smirk* ahh, i'm so tempted to find out where you live, buy the poster, and send it to you...
Chibi Miyu: in that case, i shall NEVER let you know my address
KuroiTsubasaKei: LOL
Chibi Miyu: sicko
KuroiTsubasaKei: *snicker* aww, don't be mad
Chibi Miyu: -_-
KuroiTsubasaKei: ^^;;; *fervently looks for Haku pics*

...eheh...heh heh heh... *tries to smother laughter* I'm sorry, I really am... if I could, I'd like to open my brain and give it a thorough washing, but, well, the notion of green-poster!nick carter=draco has stuck itself firmly in the crevices of my mind... and shall not be dislodged. And strangely, the first time I saw the picture (and subsequently found out who it was), I knew I had to show Vinita. ^^;;; *shudders from the sheer squick*

gomen nasai!!
11:40 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Wednesday, June 11, 2003
Playlist: Living Through - Core of Soul

Countdown to Graduation:2 DAYS!!

And can you believe that we have a final math test tomorrow??? It's ridiculous, how worked up people are getting over this test. I mean, a test the day before half the class graduates! At least we get to bring a notecard *scuttles off to make notes*

06:06 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Tuesday, June 10, 2003
Playlist: Nocturne no.21 - Chopin

There are still some bugs in the blog code, and my computer is not quirky dammit! *scowls at dra-chan* It's not! *is in serious denial* Hopefully all shall be fixed by next week.

11:59 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Tuesday, June 10, 2003
Playlist: Rhapsody on a Theme by Paganini - Rachmaninov

Countdown to Graduation:3 DAYS!!

ohmygod so close yet so far!
11:47 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Monday, June 9, 2003
Playlist: Le Damnation de Faust - Berlioz

Countdown to Graduation:4 DAYS!!

Whoo hooo~~
09:04 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Monday, June 9, 2003
Playlist:

Good god the horror! -___-;; That's... unspeakable! If they were going to do a live action series on any anime, why oh WHY couldn't they have picked Hikaru no Go??? It would be such a kickass live action series, and tons better than Sailor Moon... *groans heartily*

07:24 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Monday, June 9, 2003
Playlist: Caprice no. 24 - Paganini

Today, my Mood Analysis is...:

You are tending to pursue your objectives with concentrated intensity and it would seem that whatever obstacles may come into your path, you will stick to your guns and will not allow yourself to be deflected from your purpose. You are striving to achieve recognition and what is more - you deserve it.

For some time now you may have been subjected to considerable physical illness and or emotional distress. This may have taken a severe toll and you feel both physically and mentally worn out. Your self esteem has been reduced and you now need a peaceful environment which will permit you to effect full recovery.

Although you are, deep down, a very caring person, you are very particular in the choice of friends and indeed very demanding at times. You can be most quarrelsome and controversial and it is because of this argumentative trait you can at times explode into open conflict - conflict with even those you may care for and love. It is because of this inherent argumentative streak in you that may have resulted in broken hopes and dreams.

All of your stress arises from lack of mutual understanding. The existing situation is unsatisfactory and you feel that you are unable to improve it without the help and co-operation of others. The need for understanding and for affectionate 'give and take' remains unsatisfied. You are experiencing the feeling of being 'handcuffed' - 'tied down' - 'hindered' - 'restrained' and this untenable situation is giving rise to impatience, irritability and the desire to escape from it all.

You really would like to be completely uninhibited - to let your hair down - but you are held back by your sense of logic and rationality, since you realize that by simple stupidity you could lose everything - whatever that may be.

and my Archetype...:

The Map: The Map personality is often deeply and intimately involved in the world. This world however is usually inside his/her own mind. Thoughtful to the extreme, this type is often obsessed with perfection and the rules governing their own personal interests.

They are generally good-natured people, and are often in areas not important to them very easy-going. Step across the line in regard to something the Map deems important however and you will recognize the wrath of the true believer. Principles to the Map are generally black and white. Their understanding of these principles however are always in question. Because the Map personality believes strongly in justice, it will often question its own perceptions, in fear that a mistake could have disastrous consequences. This prevents the Map personality from becoming too dictatorial or didactic.

-_____-;;; Colorgenics

06:32 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Sunday, June 8, 2003
Playlist:

Stupid F'ing Elitesystem stupid F'ing set a limit on the stupid F'ing image hosting so that I spent a stupid F'ing hour trying to make the Hisoka pic smaller without actually resizing it. And then lo! Eugene comes along, helps me out, and I finally get the stupid F'ing system to take my file. And then what happens? My html code now has stupid F'ing problems that I haven't the skill to deal with. I am clearly not cut out to be good with computers and such. I'm amazed I've managed to nose my way this far.

And, thank you SO MUCH! Free lunch every month! Don't forget to claim.

11:59 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Friday, June 6, 2003
Playlist: Caprice no.24 - Paganini

YesAsia.com sells dry-packed ramen online... I find that just wrong.

XD XD ah, yes, and, I'm back~, after almost a whole week of nothing, because yes, I'm finally done with my hardest final, the grilling, drool-inducing, sleep-depriving anatomy final, which I needed a 90% on for me to get an A in the class (yes, I've been slacking off over the course of the semester, how did you guess?). Unfortunately (and this is the funny part) I've been busy all week and only really got to studying last night, after coming back from the last orchestra concert of the year, and what do I go and do (aside from studying)? I fall asleep in the middle of the lymphatic system, and wake up at 7:30 this morning, even though I'd set my alarm clocks (note the plural; alarm CLOCKS) to wake me up at 4:30. Stupid, really, to think I could rely on the two alarm clocks that consistently mistake p.m. for a.m. and have been ringing my ears off at precisely 6:30 in the evening everyday for the past two weeks. Oh yes, very smart, I'm sure, for me to have thought that perhaps if I fiddled with it, I could get it to ring in the morning instead of in the afternoon. Sooooooo, annyyyywaaaayyyy... I wake up this morning, resist the urge to throw my alarm clocks against the wall, and rush to school so I could squeeze in an hour of study before the test. Well, I think the ~~studying~~cramming helped somewhat, as there were quite a few questions on the test that pertained to some of the stuff I burned into my brain half a minute before the test started. Like the dilation stage of birth. And alpha amylase. I also noticed, aside from my obvious lack of common sense, that Jennifer wasn't in class today to take the final... I hope you took it third period, Jen, because otherwise you have some explaining to do.

Alright, so this week has been packed with events. Monday was the senior awards ceremony, therefore no studying was done. Tuesday was the Mayor's Award's ceremony, and no studying was done as well. Wednesday I got some studying and note-taking down my throat, but also had to work on my Composition final (3-4 pg. creative story, typed). Thursday, yesterday... well, there was the composition final, which was a breeze, and then there was that concert, which I stage-crewed and shushed everyone backstage into silence while chamber groups performed onstage. I also page-turned for Kaye, although I messed up rather horribly at one point, turning a page just a little too early. It turned out that he didn't have that part memorized, and turned the page back himself, and then flipping it again two seconds later. Man, that was bad. But I made up for it by doing it ok for the rest of the piece. Anyway, after sitting THAT close to a pianist while said pianist was in the midst of a performance, I think I'm heartily in love with the piano again. Nothing seems quite as alive and full of vitality as someone pounding into a piano. *___* *cough* anyway, I'll quite waxing poetic about the merits of pianos and music and um... *wanders off to listen to Chopin*

Er, so, there was that end of the year senior sendoff at the end of the concert. Everyone chipped into to get Karen a nice music stand of her own so that she'd no longer have to suffer the horrible school stands. Jonah made a video with all the seniors in it and showed it to the audience. It was hilarious. Unfortunately, I missed all of the shootings, so I wasn't in the 'movie trailer for this summer's blockbuster, staring all of the seniors'. I feel a bit bad about missing that, but oh well. After the concert, I go home, I study, I fall asleep, and the rest, as they say, is history. After the anatomy final, I went to the YMCA, then around lunch I headed up to Telegraph to Rasputin, because I've been on a classical music binge lately and I desperately wanted Le damnation de Faust by Berlioz, as well as La Forza del Destino by Verdi. I didn't find either in the used section (only had enough money for second hand), but I did find a Bizet CD that had both L'Arlesienne (Suite no.1 & 2) and Carmen (Suite no.1 & 2)! Squeee~~ *dances in delight* Ah, so wonderful to have found such a great arrangement~ The only problem I have with the recording is that the Bohemian Dance in Carmen Suite no.2 would have sounded better if they'd played it faster. I also found another gem: a Rimsky-Korsakov Greatest Hits CD~~ It has The Flight of the Bumblebee, Dance of the Tumblers (from The Snow Maiden), Hymn to the Sun (from Le Coq d'or), Capriccio Espagnol, Procession of the Nobles (from Mlada), The Song of India (from Sadko), Russian Easter Overture, Tale of the Young Prince and the Young Princess, and Festival at Baghdad; The Sea; The Ship Goes to Pieces On a Rock Surmounted by a Bronze Warrior; Conclusion (from Sheherazade). The best part is the some of the pieces are performed by the Philadelphia Orchestra, conducted by Eugene Ormandy, which I consider to be a good combination, much like the San Francisco Symphony Orchestra and Michael Tilson-Thomas (they're just not the same when he goes off to conduct other orchestras!). *smiles happily*

When I came home, Mom wanted to take me to DMV to get that ID card I applied for last year and still haven't gotten. They told me I'd have to apply again, except they won't charge me this time. DMV makes me violent. Violently murderous. DMV makes me think of all the dirty words I know. I wanted to kick something. And there was an annoying, whiny girl behind me that complained every five minutes about how there was no place to sit, and kept on leaning over my shoulder to look at the book I was reading. Ugh. Too close. I wanted to slap her away. Again, DMV makes me violent.

dum dumdum dumdum dumdum
05:30 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Tuesday, June 3, 2003
Playlist: The Devil's Trill - (Itzhak Perlman) Tartini

Your Brain Usage Profile

Auditory : 25%
Visual : 75%
Left : 52%
Right : 47%

Angela, you exhibit an even balance between left- and right- hemisphere dominance and a slight preference for visual over auditory processing. With a score this balanced, it is likely that you would have slightly different results each time you complete this self-assessment quiz.

You are a well-rounded person, distinctly individualistic and artistic, an active and multidimensional learner. At the same time, you are logical and disciplined, can operate well within an organization, and are sensitive towards others without losing objectivity. You are organized and goal-directed. Although a "thinking" individual, you "take in" entire situations readily and can act on intuition.

You sometimes tend to vacillate in your learning styles. Learning might take you longer than someone of equal intellect, but you will tend to be more thorough and retain the material longer than those other individuals. You will alternate between logic and impulse. This vacillation will not normally be intentional or deliberate, so you may experience anxiety in situations where you are not certain which aspect of yourself will be called on.

With a slight preference for visual processing, you tend to be encompassing in your perceptions, process along multidimensional paths and be active in your attacking of situations or learning.

Overall, you should feel content with your life and yourself. You are, perhaps, a little too critical of yourself - and of others - while maintaining an "openness" which tempers that tendency. Indecisiveness is a problem and your creativity may not be in keeping with your potential. Being a pragmatist, you downplay this aspect of yourself and focus on the more immediate, obvious and the more functional.

Mind Media Brain Persuasion Test

10:32 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Sunday, June 1, 2003
Playlist: Kuukiryodan - Do As Infinity

It's too early in the day for me to be blogging about the day's events, but what the hell, here goes:

Woke up around 9 (O___o what? Why? How? I didn't go to bed till 1 am last night and god knows I need the extra hours), felt bored, read some of "Origins" in bed, got up around 12, wandered around, changed my clothes, wandered around a bit more, changed my clothes again. Mom came back from church and hogged the computer for her little translation-of-immigration-documents project. Under the pretense of studying for the anatomy final (next Friday, yegawds), I read bits more of "Origins", well, not quite read, but more like flit through it. Maryam, Joe, Melissa, Kevin all arrived to work on their project. I wandered around the house a bit more, played with the cat, pretended to be studying (yes, I was reading "Origins"), had breakfast/lunch/really-early-dinner. Mom went out a couple of hours ago, leaving house to me and some flies that flew in through the open front door and refused to leave. Maryam et al. are still hammering, sawing, glueing their projects in the back yard, and I've lose interest in what they're doing. An hour ago, I happened to look at the computer, realize that it was available, and decided to catch up on email. So, that occupied my attention for a while. Spartacus and I have an ongoing discussion abortion, and the more we discuss it, the more confused I am. I've decided that there are few subjects that interest me enough that I'd babble passionately, and abortion isn't one of them (and therefore, I can talk about it relatively clear-headedly). Anyway, I've sent the email off, and now I'm bored again. *sulk* I hate this particular brand of boredom, because I know there are things I should do, but I can't concentrate long enough to do it.

Oh, yeah, and Colin came over with Kuniko. Apparently he'd just come back from MIT yesterday. I wanted to talk to him, but didn't really get a chance to, as Mom was leaving soon, and Maryam was wailing about a burnt finger (poor dear, practically glue-guned herself...) and it was something of a formal visit, Colin sitting primly in the living room while our mothers talked. So, they left, and soon he'll be gone elsewhere because of a job, and he won't be at my graduation. Yuh. And he's filled out his form, so he doesn't look so freakin' tall anymore. Yuh.

*wanders around the house a bit more*
04:13 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Friday, May 30, 2003
Playlist:

Ever get a little voice inside you that leers and says inappropriate things at the most inappropriate times? It's like your own personal demon.

10:29 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Friday, May 30, 2003
Playlist:

My goodness I think I heartily love Veela Inc. It's one of the best moderated Yahoo! Group I'm subscribing to. One of the founders just posted a spoiler policy, preventing anyone from talking about the 5th book until a week after it's come out. So organized~ Very impressive.

Joe, you're an idiot. Don't ever do what you did today, EVER AGAIN!

10:06 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Thursday, May 29, 2003
Playlist: Immortelle - Lara Fabian

This is a narrative post. I shall be complaining. Be forewarned.

Two days ago, I had to get a blood test for a doctor's appointment I had today. The guy who did it at Quest Diagnostic couldn't find the vein in my right arm, and there was a lot of under-the-skin poking around before he finally decided to just take blood from my left arm (it's always my left arm; I have so many needle-scars on my left arm), and when he stuck the tube in, the blood gushed out so fast it made a fwoosh sound. It makes me feel better that my body is so alive and... kicking. Anyway, today, yearly check-up with my pediatrician. I cannot stress how utterly cool my doctor is. Apparently, just because I'm 18 now doesn't mean I have to find a new doctor. She says I can stay in her practice until I'm 20. Yay~ Got immunization shots for meningococcal and hepatitis A. One on each arm, again. More needle-scars, hoorray. Doctor also prescribed me a new medicine for my foot, since the previous pill had strange side affects. This one has side affects too, but at least there won't be any "mental confusion".

I skipped a couple of classes today. I just couldn't be bothered to care. Even now, I'm toying with the idea of staying up all night to study for a bonus test for anatomy, and a part of me is wondering if I should even care, if I can risk not taking it and still keep my grade slightly above the borderline. Ah, I'm so tired, I don't know if I can stay up, if I will give into temptation and just sleep. I'm in a weird mood. During one of the periods that I skipped today, I went and got lunch, as well as a work application. During another skipped period, I sat down in the courtyard and wrote a story. I think the story is finished, although I'm very tempted to snip off the last couple of sentences. I lost the mood for the story 3/4 of the way through, so in my eyes, the story went downhill around there, although if the story was already downhill from the beginning, then it wouldn't make much of a difference. Anyway, I don't think I shall post it here; it's too messed up. Maybe on the other blog. Maybe. I'm half-proud and half-ashamed of the story; proud because I actually managed to finish it, and even work something symbolic into it, and ashamed because... well, I can already imagine the weird looks I'll get if I ever decide to read it to anyone. Or maybe it'll take their breaths away. It took my breath away when I wrote it, but there's a reason for that, that wouldn't exactly pertain to anyone else.

=___=
10:09 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Tuesday, May 27, 2003
Playlist:

.........

wanker... bullocks... git...

......

XD XD XD;;;;;;; Ahhh, British curse words, so amusing, so fun, so interesting!

derives decided pleasure
09:23 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Tuesday, May 27, 2003
Playlist:

*mock gasp* Ye gods! She bloggeth! *flying glomp* Welcome back~~ I wanna see you on AIM! Come talk with me! And yes, I did say that about Seattle~ But, do let hell freeze over and blog some more, pretty please? *tosses Dobby-sized eyes at you* XD XD;;

09:17 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Tuesday, May 27, 2003
Playlist:

Ahh, I just wrote my first check... ^_____^ What an interesting feeling. Admittedly, my checking account is now $500.00 less than it was half an hour ago, but, well, I think there's enough in it to tie me over until I finally get a job.

09:11 p.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Monday, May 26, 2003
Playlist:

Topic: Joe fucks up and lets something stupid slip in AIM Chatroom and tries to save it with a lame excuse...
Ambiancelve: oh man that was dumb
KuroiTsubasaKei: yeah, really!
Ambiancelve: the save was stupid too
Ambiancelve: haha
Ambiancelve: hey im bored
Ambiancelve: gimme a break
KuroiTsubasaKei: mooncrescent9: this has nothing to do with the internet connection right?
KuroiTsubasaKei: -___-
Ambiancelve: what
KuroiTsubasaKei: mooncrescent9: he is sooo lying
Ambiancelve: oh shit haha
Ambiancelve: bullshit man help me in the chatroom
KuroiTsubasaKei: lol
KuroiTsubasaKei: helping
Ambiancelve: fucking a
Ambiancelve: haha
KuroiTsubasaKei: lol you got yourself into this mess
Ambiancelve: hey i know
Ambiancelve: heh isnt this great? fucking things up
KuroiTsubasaKei: lol
KuroiTsubasaKei: sure, whatever
Ambiancelve: tell me u werent amused
Ambiancelve: i was
KuroiTsubasaKei: i was, but it also gave me a near heart attack
Ambiancelve: LOL
KuroiTsubasaKei: seriously
KuroiTsubasaKei: man, you and jen, gonna kill me someday
Ambiancelve: lol
KuroiTsubasaKei: jen: what's he talking about angela?
KuroiTsubasaKei: you: hahaha fun to fuck up isn't it hahaha help me angela hahaha
Ambiancelve: LOL

02:27 a.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Sunday, May 25, 2003
Playlist:

I really want to be drunk right now. I'm not addicted or anything, far from it. In fact, I think I've finally discerned why I might like alchohol so much and sometimes need it so badly. I know why I drink. Do you?

Pity me, oh dreamless sleep.

01:14 a.m.

"Only two things are infinite - the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe." - Albert Einstein
Sunday, May 25, 2003
Playlist:

Ok, I'm not sure why I didn't see this before, but... in aura, in the way people perceive them, and the way they're projected, Remus Lupin = Cho Hakkai... I even imagine Remus Lupin to look something like Hakkai.

12:28 a.m.